Just had to share this thought…
(and I know you’re reading this, too…)
I recently had an encounter with an ex-lover who wanted to get back together again. I’m not against reconciliations in general. By all means, I know there are some happy endings out there for those who have tried to get back together after a break up. For me, it is not that simple. The factors that broke us up in the first place are what needs to be considered first before I would even entertain the risk of allowing this person back into my life. Needless to say, this guy had quite a few irreconcilable factors working against him.
For one, I cannot stand cheaters. That, to me, is the most appalling, unnecessary, and sickening thing anyone can be. The thought of swapping germs with some stranger because your lover slept with them behind your back and has now passed their DNA on to you is so nauseating to me. I do not tolerate any excuses or reasons for cheating since I am not a cheater myself. I do not see the logic in it. I do not search for the logic in it, neither.
(Cheating is one of those deal breakers that is not acceptable as far as I am concerned. All it takes is one time, and I am done with you. No exceptions. No “oops it was an accident” alibi will be accepted. Accidents are things such as slipping on a banana peel or a patch of ice and falling. How does one accidentally slip and fall into a vagina?? Seriously?!)
Second, I cannot tolerate liars. Lies destroy any chances of me ever trusting you, even if it is a “white lie” or “small” lie when it comes to getting to know a potential lover. For me, ALL lies are dark and big in regards to relationships! Lies prevent a good, solid foundation of trust from ever forming in a relationship. Without trust, there is no relationship. You would just be a waste of my time.
Third, I do not tolerate games. I expect romance games to come from a teenager, not a x-something year old man. Find some other substantial way to get my attention or to see how I feel about you, otherwise, you can expect my interest dwindle down to zilch very quickly. Hey I have a brilliant idea; why not try ASKING ME DIRECTLY? Oh wait, you did try that when we were together, but you thought I was playing games. Now I see why; because you were playing them all along. That’s just crazy. The word “paranoid” comes to mind, and rightfully so. What goes around certainly does come back around, but I can assure you it will not be by me. Period.
Third, do not try to come back into my life just as jacked up as you were when I got you out of it. Remember, I know you well, probably better than you know yourself, and can tell when you are about to lie to me well before you can fix your mouth to say it. Your morals, principles, and standards have not changed. In fact, you never had any; it is kind of hard to fix something you never had in the first place. All that will end up happening if we did get back together is we will end up right back at square one again-broken up. And probably within the first date or two. Again, a waste of time.
Fourth, I cannot stand two-faced people; grinning in my face while you speak horrific things about another person, then going to that same person grinning in their face speaking horrific things about me to them. That is just too girly of a trait to have as a man as far as I am concerned, not to mention childish and immature. Behavior like that also makes me question whether or not if you really are a heterosexual, also. To be honest, I still do wonder…
In closing, if you do not ever hear from me again, you now know why. In case you are still in a fog as to why, I will put it to you as simply this: I do not like emotional rollercoasters. You were the worst ride anyone has ever taken me on in my life; a bunch of senseless drops, turns, and twists that had no logical point to them other than for your own sadistic, sick and twisted entertainment. I do not wish to ride that coaster again. I have learned quite a bit while on your ride, and I can say I am grateful for the lessons I have learned from it all and the precious wisdom I have gained as a result of those lessons. Ironically, your mess turned into my treasure…the hard way, yet, in the most profitable of ways that has taken me to places and introduced people into my life that I would have probably never met otherwise.
So save the speeches about how things will be different this time around, because I am the one who really has changed although you haven’t. I am not the risk-taker you once knew.
Still wishing you all the best. Have a nice life 🙂
© 2013 Learus Ohnine