What Would You Do If… ??

… if someone you knew was about to get involved with a sociopath, what would you do? Do you warn the person, hoping the person isn’t too far gone to realize it’s not too late to turn back around? Or do you mind your own business and hope for the best outcome?

 

For me, I can’t just sit still and watch a blind man (or woman) fall into a ditch. That’s not me.

 

However, we can never be so sure that maybe warning someone might be the cause of a disaster, whereas the warned person uses this info to their advantage to help facilitate their ulterior motive for the sociopath. That’s not me, either.

 

Although I have no romantic interest in neither the sociopath or it’s victim, there’s a part of me that will always  feel funny knowing what I know and not doing anything about it. If something tragic were to happen, I would never be able to forgive myself.

 

On the other hand, people can become highly offended when they hear the truth about someone they don’t want to think of in any other light but the way the person has presented themselves. Sociopaths, especially, get highly vindictive when they’ve been exposed. This might backfire if I try to intervene.

 

If you were in this situation, what would you do?

 

 

 

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

 

 

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The Differences Between A Sociopath And A Narcissist

When we try to analyze the people we cross paths with in society, it is possible to misinterpret our analysis for lack of a better understanding. For those who have crossed paths with a sociopath and a narcissist on separate occasions, it may seem like there is little to no difference between the two when in fact one can be mistaken for the other. Both are considered to be social terrorists, however, there are distinguishing characteristics that would imply neither of them are one in the same. Therefore, I would like to explain briefly the differences in character between these two personality disorders…

Narcissist will let you know up front what they are about. They will tell you grandiose stories of themselves of either their accomplishments (real or fake) or of their associations with important people (real or fake). They generally do not tell these stories for any other gain than to hear praises. They have an unquenchable desire to be admired, worshiped, and adulated with no real gain from those that respond to them in this way other than to feed their own ego. They need to be the center of attention at all times in any social gathering.

Sociopath will NOT let you know up front what they are about, because they wear a mask to hide their true identity. They will tell you grandiose stories of themselves of either their accomplishments (real or fake, but mostly fake) or of their associations with important people (real or fake, but mostly fake.) They generally tell these stories to appear as a “good person” to gain trust and as a cover-up for their ulterior motives. They have the same unquenchable desires as the Narcissist as a result of the power and control they gain over their victims. They do not care to be the center of attention at all times in any social gathering unless doing so promises to earn them more unsuspecting victims.

 

Here’s a few more brief distinguishing characteristics:

A Narcissist can have a conscious/conscience, and will sometimes hurt others unintentionally. A Sociopath has no conscious/conscience whatsoever, nor do they have any remorse for hurting others intentionally; the more damage, the better they feel.

A Narcissist can be constructive. A Sociopath is always destructive.

A Narcissist’s world can be built by their own hands. A Sociopath prefers their world to be built by someone else’s hands, and will take full credit for it.

A Narcissist is self-deceptive. A Sociopath is socially deceptive.

A Narcissist needs admirers. A Sociopath needs victims.

A Narcissist needs to be adulated to appease their insecurities and fragile ego. A Sociopath needs to be adulated to appease and camouflage their ulterior motives.

A Narcissist lacks empathy in the form of belittling, name-calling, and defaming another’s character. A Sociopath lacks empathy in a criminal or physically violent way.

A Narcissist accepts who they are but exploits themselves in an overly-exaggerated and excessively-dramatic grandiose manner. A Sociopath pretends to be someone who they are not to hide their hidden agendas in order to keep from being exploited.

 

Both think they are superior to anyone and everyone they meet. Both think they deserve special treatment. Both process the world differently, and both play to “win.” However, it is possible for both personality traits to be combined into one, which is called a “Narcissistic Sociopath” , and is more dangerous to deal with than the two individuals separately.

 

 

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

The Sociopath: A Social Terrorist (part 2)

“So it is now just one week away from your anticipated outing with the person you have fallen in love with. All plans have been discussed, understood, and agreed upon. You find yourself constantly thinking about the perfect outfit to wear, fantasize about what you two will share, and daydream about how the day will end. Throughout this entire week, you have been feeling all giddy inside thanks to this wonderful person who has an uncanny ability to say the right things to you at the right time. You have never felt as connected to someone as you do right now.

During the outing, you two seem to be having a terrific time and you find yourself wanting to open up more and more to this person. They seem to draw it all out of you with ease by making you feel so comfortable and safe around them. They appear to be an open book; holding nothing back about their hopes, their dreams, and their fears. They mention about how they have been grossly misunderstood all their life, and all they want is to find that one person who they can connect with; someone who is not vindictive or spiteful like all the rest have been towards them in spite of their efforts to help them. This person, who seems so eager to learn what makes you tick, tells you you are like a “vacation” for them, and expresses how much they enjoy learning more about you. You cannot believe just how much ground you two have uncovered about each other in such a short period of time. It seems like you two have a real connection going on with each other along with so many things in common. You want more than anything else in the world to give a sincere honest impression of yourself, so you do not hold anything back in hopes of earning their trust. You decide to open yourself up to this person with all sincerity of the truth from your heart, just the way they did towards you. Therefore, you too begin to talk endlessly about your hopes, your dreams, and your fears… your fears.

(Uh oh, big mistake…)

After all this talk about what makes each other tick, you feel you can completely trust this person with all of your heart, mind, and soul. You confide this fact with them, and are delighted to know that they feel the same way about you, too. Because of this new revelation, you two agree to become closer and closer, making more and more plans together…

(…and then the nightmare REALLY begins…)

After a few weeks (or days even), you start to notice a considerable change in this person since the very beginning. They tell to call them anytime, but when you do, they are always unavailable. They tell you stop by anytime, but when you do, they are always too busy for company. They seem to say one thing, but do another that is nothing even close to what they say they will do. They seem to call less, text less, and when there is an open line of communication between the two of you, it is very short and very brief with little or no substance to what this person says. You start to feel as if you may have made a big mistake by trusting every word this person has said to you. You express this concern to them, who in turn assures you everything is fine, you did not make any mistakes at all, and you are just being paranoid. Your mind and heart begin to battle each other. 

Your mind considers every rational behind why they say you are being paranoid, yet your heart still tells you something is definitely not right with their rational. Before you can discuss more about how unsure you are feeling, the person has moved on to other subjects seemingly non-stop without giving you the chance to get not even one word in edgewise. The next thing you know, something has came up and the person has to end the conversation, but promises to continue it when they call you later on that day. Without thinking twice about it, you wonder exactly when will this person call again since they seem to be sporadic with keeping their word. Surprisingly, they call you later that same day just like they said they would, however, they seem very irritated when you try to pick up the conversation from where the two of you left off at. They brush your concerns off of discussing anything about the changes in their behavior, belittle you for making such a fuss over how you feel, and somehow manage to shift the blame for their behavior onto you by stating every illogical reason why it is your fault. You are stunned at their accusations that are mixed with fact and fiction, but still try to defend yourself by correcting their bizarre beliefs. They ignore what you say regardless of how accurate you point out the flaws in their theories. Suddenly they end the conversation, leaving you bewildered and confused as to what just happened.”

First, let me explain why it is a big mistake to open yourself up to a sociopath. Two of the defining traits of a sociopath are glibness and superficiality. The sociopath likes to play with words. By this, I mean the sociopath has a way of explaining  their childhood, their family, their friends, and the relationships they have experienced by mixing lies with the truth without giving away too much detail that will expose themselves for what they truly are. Most all of their stories usually entail how they were either a hero or a victim, depending on whatever tales and adventures you have told, they try to match theirs up with yours to make it appear you two have an enormous amount in common. They use this technique in order to get you to trust them quicker. When you trust someone, you are more apt to open yourself up to them with sincerity, clarity, and honesty. Remember, the core reason for everything the sociopath does is that unquenchable desire to control in order to feel powerful. The only way they can do this is by learning you, and they usually succeed through their deceptive recollections of the woes, chaos, and misery they have experienced in each relationship they have ever had. What they will fail to tell you is how they were the ones who caused all the woes, misery, and chaos.

Second, the sociopath does not begin to open up unless they have verified you will not question them too deeply about the things they say and/or do, because this will afford them space they need to tell more lies that all sound believable. As long as they know they are deceiving you, they will feel as though they are in control of you. As long as they feel they are in control of you, they feel powerful. For example, in the scenario described in the beginning of The Sociopath: A Social Terrorist (part 1) , the sociopath was never questioned for their odd change in behavior. They were never asked if anything was wrong that would warrant their strange behavior because they made sure it was clearly understood how much they despise questions. Usually, the sociopath despises questions because they tend to lie so much and so often that they lose track of what they have already told you. When questioned, they become furious. Any normal human being who is telling the truth would have no problem explaining the truth again. For the sociopath, it is mentally agonizing to recall everything that they have already said since a majority of what they have said was a lie. 

Lastly, the sociopath needs to know what makes you tick to learn how much they can get away with. They probe you looking for any weaknesses you may have. These weaknesses are what they will use to exploit you later on when they cannot have their way with having control and power over you. Remember in The Sociopath: A Social Terrorist (part 1) , they first started satisfying their need to control and feel powerful by causing enormous pain and suffering on helpless animals. The keyword here is “helpless”. During the entire time you are opening up to the sociopath, they are looking for anything they see as a sign of weakness that they can use to break you down to a level of helplessness. While you are opening up to them, the first thing that grabs their undivided attention is your fears.  If you have not already opening expressed them, they will most definitely ask about them. Your fears equals their control.

In a healthy relationship, we want to know our partner’s fears so we can make sure they never ever happen. When the sociopath know your fears, they will devise plans to make them come true in order to get their way, and more importantly, to feel like they have some sort of power and control over you. Eventually, you will give in to their unreasonable demands after they have exploited your fears in hopes the sociopath will stop this sadistic way of manipulating you into submission. They do the same with your hopes and dreams; they will deliberately find ways to intercept them, delay them, and even destroy them when they cannot have their way as a way of showing you just how much control they can have over you. In this, you will get the chance to see just how cold and heartless they can be, for they have no boundaries as to what lengths they will go to make sure they get what they want. But mostly, the sociopath will pretend to be concerned in making your hopes and dreams come true (especially if it involves a “happy ending” with them) as a way to keep you holding on to this dysfunctional relationship that will only reveal itself to be a catastrophic failure in the end. This provides them with a sense of security while they secretly plan and plot to get whatever it is they want to get out of you.

This type of behavior is called “passive aggressiveness”, and is the prime tool the sociopath uses to mentally torture you once they have won you completely. Some of the ways the sociopath might behave to achieve control are listed below:

Non-Communication: when there is clearly something problematic to discuss

Avoiding/Ignoring: when you are so angry that you feel you cannot speak calmly

Evading: problems and issues, burying an angry head in the sand

Procrastinating: intentionally putting off important tasks for less important ones

Obstructing: deliberately stalling or preventing an event or process of change

Fear of Competition: Avoiding situations where one party will be seen as better at something

Ambiguity: Being cryptic, unclear, not fully engaging in conversations

Sulking: Being silent, morose, sullen and resentful in order to get attention or sympathy.

Chronic Lateness: A way to put you in control over others and their expectations

Chronic Forgetting: Shows a blatant disrespect and disregard for others to punish in some way

Fear of Intimacy: Often there can be trust issues with passive aggressive people and guarding against becoming too intimately involved or attached will be a way for them to feel in control of the relationship

Making Excuses: Always coming up with reasons for not doing things

Victimisation: Unable to look at their own part in a situation will turn the tables to become the victim and will behave like one

Self-Pity: the poor me scenario

Blaming: others for situations rather than being able to take responsibility for your own actions or being able to take an objective view of the situation as a whole.

Withholding: usual behaviours or roles for example sex, cooking and cleaning or making cups of tea, running a bath etc. all to reinforce an already unclear message to the other party

Learned Helplessness: where a person continually acts like they can’t help themselves – deliberately doing a poor job of something for which they are often explicitly responsible

The above except was taken from the following website: What is Passive Aggressive Behavior?

(to be continued…)

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

The Sociopath: A Social Terrorist (part 1)

“You have attracted the attention of one of the most wonderful people on the planet… or so it seems. He/She initially swept you off your feet with what appears to be a deep concern for your well-being along with their impeccable amount of attention focused on every aspect of your life, the past, present, and future. He/She seems so interested in getting to know you. They constantly praise you for your achievements, accomplishments and pending goals. They have a profound interest in your past relationships as well as your past in general. If you are a parent, they will offer advice that seems harmless and flawless, because after all, they appear to have such expertise in anything and everything they speak about. To you, they are flawless; you both have the same standards, morals, and principles. You cannot believe just how lucky you are to actually have someone like this person walk into your life at the right moment. They are such a charmer, and every word they speak sounds so sincere.  The amount of ease this person makes you feel is incredible. 

(However, something still just does not seem right, but you cannot quite put your finger on what it is…)

As time moves on, you begin to notice little glitches in their words. They hop from subject to subject quicker than a flame can burn through a plastic bag. They seem scattered in the way they think. “Oh they just have some problems like they told me”, you say to yourself. You start thinking with a little more support and understanding, you can help them cope with their problems they once stated they have. All they need is to know they have someone in their corner no matter what, and so you declare your concern for helping them. You want to make it clear to this person they are not alone. 

(And then the nightmare begins…)

You two have just finished an ordinary conversation on the telephone like usual. They tell you about their day; you tell them about yours. They tell you about some goals they have, and you share yours with them as well. Within the discussion, they tell you they think it is a great idea that the two of you work together in helping each other meet those goals. They mention a few plans they have in mind that they would like to do with you, and you willing agree to them without a second thought. You confess how happy they have made you, they express how happy they are to have found someone like you, and they cannot wait for the moment to come when you two start your adventures together. Now, you both have something to look forward to… or so you think…

You decide to call this person back a little while later to share a new thought on your joint up-and-coming adventures. As soon as they answer, you cannot believe your ears. They sound totally different about the adventures as they did before. They seem less interested before you even get a chance to speak. They lack the same enthusiasm as they showed before. “How can this person change so quickly?” you may ask yourself. This makes you curious as to why the sudden change in attitude, but you do not question it, and certainly do not want to question them for fear of losing them. After all, they told you most of the relationships they were in dissolved because they were sick of being questioned. Instead, you make excuses for them as to why they could be acting this way instead of finding out the truth for yourself.

(“The heart knoweth his own bitterness; and a stranger doth not intermeddle with his joy.” Proverbs 14:11)

The following day, you notice there is less and less enthusiasm from the person about your day, your thoughts, your life, and your problems which this person seemed so eager to find solutions to up until this point. In fact, you find yourself doing all the contacting with this person whereas they used to contact you non-stop. You think to yourself maybe this is not a good day for them as they begin to make you feel as if you are bothering them, and so you wait. They contact you the next day. You suddenly notice changes in their personality and conflicting stories, standards, morals, and principles with the ones they have previously told you before. You think to yourself again “Oh they just have some problems they need to work out like they said”, but deep down, a part of you begins to wonder what is really going on…”

Self-deception; when you are deceived, you do not know you are deceived. This trait in you is like seventh heaven to a sociopath…

Before I go any further, let me explain what a sociopath really is. A sociopath, or psychopath, is a person with a serious mental illness that can easily go undetected by the untrained and inexperienced eye. To put it politely, the person suffers from what is defined in medical terms as an “antisocial personality disorder”. Please note I use the term “suffer” lightly in the context of that sentence. The term “antisocial personality disorder” originated by the acts of the sociopath that is socially unacceptable. They have no guilt, no remorse, and no shame for what they do to people. They are aware they have this personality disorder, yet, they care nothing about the destruction they cause in the lives of innocent people because of it. They have a total disregard for the truth, and this is why they need someone “foolish” enough to deceive themselves by making excuses for the sociopath’s behavior as well as be willing to be deceived by them.

When a sociopath talks about their childhood (that is IF they tell the truth about it), these people usually give you a clue they may be a sociopath. One clue is the mentioning of brutally torturing animals until they die. Pay attention to their facial expression as they recall such horrendous acts; their face will light up like a child’s on Christmas morning. The thoughts and sights of inflicting pain on a poor defenseless creature excites them to no end. Do not be confused with a childhood act of squashing bugs or riding the family dog like it is a horse. This goes way beyond that. We are talking inflicting severe unbearable pain on animals that scream and bleed until they die, such as cats, kittens, dogs, puppies, goats, birds, and even frogs. Do not be surprised if a sociopath has these animals as pets as an adult; they do want to give you the impression they are a peace-and-nature loving human being. However, do be surprised if these animals suddenly come up missing without a logical cause or reason, especially after they have expressed such desires to have the pet to begin with. This evil desire to watch an animal cry out in agony until it dies does not go away as the sociopath becomes an adult; they only move on to “bigger and better things”, or in other words, more self-fulfilling things. That desire to harm is still there, only now as an adult that desire has evolved into torturing people.

Confusion is a form of torture: it is mental torture. It is much easier for the sociopath to get away with deception if you are confused. But, in order for them to cause confusion, they first have to gain control; control over your emotions. Control, to them, equals power. They do this by charming the light sockets off of you. They agree with everything you agree with. They believe in everything you believe in. They like everything you like. It is not until they know they have won you over is when they start their confusion game. Once the game begins, you will slowly start to see the sociopath within them emerge. It will be an adventure like none other that you will never forget…

(To be continued)

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Who is Sucking The Life Out Of You?

I call these people “energy vampires”. Their existence depends on the necessities of those similar to that of a real vampire’s needs, except they do not feed on blood to survive. They thrive on draining the energy and the life out of kind, generous, warm-hearted people instead. As they draw them into their life using a smokescreen of what appears to be helplessness, neediness, and vulnerability, they measure their victim’s tolerance level to assess just how much of their madness they can handle before going mad themselves. By the time their current victim starts to crack up, they will then have enough energy to scope the area for a new victim to feed on once again.

This vicious cycle for nourishment continues throughout their entire lifetime, for without a constantly supply of unsuspecting charitable good Samaritans to feed upon, they will die. They use the nourishment they need so they can appear fresh and anew to each additional victim, for the more the merrier so as to not have to worry about being stuck without a fresh supply of energy. In fact, the advantage of living a lifestyle like this is not so much about satisfying their unquenchable hunger for human beings to drain the life out of, but it is more or less about robbing someone else of something that was once, or twice, robbed from them.

The sad part about all of this is that it is extremely hard for the victim to tear away from the vampire long enough to replenish their own energy. During the energy draining stages is when the victim is at their weakest point, and also under the most scrutiny by the energy vampire, especially if they do not already have a firm replacement already lined up and waiting. The victim will see signs within themselves of changes they would have never anticipated that utterly contradict their own nature, such as feelings of loneliness or wanting solitude more often than usual, feelings of despair about their own proficiency in making decisions, cold-heartedness and bitterness towards the opposite sex, repeatedly unexplained physical ailments, and a mental state of confusion or a feeling of “being lost” at immense levels never experienced before.

The best defense a victim of an energy vampire can have is a stable mind.  Victims have a tendency to take on other people’s problems as if they were their own, and in a sense, they are their problems too if they allow them to affect their state of mind. The victim should never forget that it was their potent strength of character, their personality, their morals, their standards, and their goodwill are what drew the energy vampire to them to in the first place, and those qualities were there without the need of having to feed off of someone else to get them. Those qualities are what victims should hold onto dearly, with honor and pride, because it is this foundation that was utilized with good intentions to help the energy vampire that will also save the victim from eternal damage through self-healing. In other words, the recycling of another energy vampire into society stops here.

If you have ever been a victim of an energy vampire, NEVER EVER let a person rob you of your identity OR your sanity and change who you are…

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Something to think about: “Walls were Made to be Broken” (part 4) The Demolition Process

Hopefully by now, you have uncovered which walls need your immediate attention and which walls do not. I would suggest beginning the demolition process on any wall that is causing an immediate hindrance to your daily living, such as anything that is interfering with your peace of mind. Nothing compares to enjoying life with a healthy state of mind. Remember – you only get one life; it is better to make the most of the time you have to spend on this earth than to waste it and regret it later.

So on to the demolition…

The demolition process basically starts off following the same procedures for both Conscious and Unconscious Walls. The only difference is the amount of time it takes to completely destroy them. That time is determined by factors such as when that wall was placed there and who put it there. For example: an Unconscious Wall that has been built by an authority figure, such as a parental figure, a lover, or whomever you have depended on for emotional support and approval, may take years to demolish simply because it has been ingrained inside your heart and mind as a necessity for survival. Let’s say, for instance, a child who grows up in an environment that is unsympathetic and is full of callousness may have had to learn to adapt to that kind of situation by becoming so thick-skinned that they do not know how to love or be loved. They reject anyone who comes across as caring and sympathetic, or the total opposite, because they do not recognize that real love and are only receptive to people who resemble the authority figures of the environment they have grown up in. They will recreate their childhood environment because that IS their comfort zone. It may take years before this person can make a successful personal transformation, but it is not impossible.

So let’s begin with a less challenging wall to destroy: the Conscious Wall. Just a quick recall, a Conscious Wall is one that is derived from a realistic fear stemmed from an illogical belief. Examples of this would be along the lines of stereotyping: ALL marriages end in divorce, ALL blondes are dimwitted, ALL males are cheaters, and ALL women are not as intelligent as a man, and so on. Plenty can be said about the stereotyping of gender, sexual preference, and races but I will not get too deep into those details. When stereotype a person, place or thing, we will react to them according to what we feel is appropriate, and that includes avoidance. Keep in mind it is healthy and wise to avoid something or someone we know for a fact is not in our best interest. However, stereotyping is not based on facts. Stereotyping is based on opinion and does not necessarily mean one part applies to the whole, if you catch my drift.

But how do we debunk any hypothetical stereotyping beliefs we may have?

Get out there and find out for yourself. Be realistic; nobody is perfect. We all have flaws, hang-ups, etc., but is that not what makes us all unique? None of our personal flaws may have anything to do with our gender, our cultural background, or our sexual preference.  The funny thing about social networking, such as Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In, etc., is we all can be whoever we want to be behind the screen, but it is the words that we speak that will be noticed by others first. We do not see a face, a race, or a gender unless we post a profile picture, and even that sometimes is not always truthful. The bottom line is: you will never know what you are missing until you get to know the character of a person. Drop everything that you have heard and read about a gender, a culture, or a sexual preference and just meet a variety of people from all, and I do mean ALL, walks of life and from any and every category. Remember, you yourself fall into one or more categories. Would you want someone to discriminate against you without giving you a fair chance?

 

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

The Realization Of Character

Everything we do starts with words. Words will determine who we are. Whatever we think we are, we will become. It is no wonder why we see so many people who struggle with low self-esteem, but that is such an extensive topic that I will save for a later discussion.

I am sure you all have heard the “formula” for how one’s character comes into fruition and the end result of where our character will lead us. If not, I will briefly go over the famous formula in order of importance:

“Words = Thoughts”

“Thoughts = Actions”

“Actions = Habits”

“Habits = Behaviors”

“Behaviors = Character”

“Character = Our Destiny”

“Words = Thoughts”: Words will determine your thoughts. Words are very powerful. Like it says in the Bible, “Life and death are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21). When we insult someone, we are killing them figuratively. When we compliment someone, we are giving them life. It does not matter if words are spoken or written; they will have the same affect on the listener and/or reader. We begin to think exactly what words tell us to think. We should be aware of what we say to one another as well as what we hear and read because once we let those words take root into our minds, we become those words.

“Thoughts = Actions”: Our thoughts have a heavy impact on the things we do. Most all of our actions start with our thoughts.  We can think ourselves into motivation, inspiration, encouragement, and so on. On the other hand, we can think ourselves into procrastination, depression, discouragement, and so on. Our thoughts will determine what we will do next.

“Actions = Habits”: Our actions will become our habits. Have you ever met someone who seemed impossible to change the way they think about themselves? They have learned to adapt to a particular way of thinking that their whole life is arranged around their thought processes.  They withdraw instead of socializing. They retreat when faced with challenges. They may have been told time and time again that they are stupid or a failure, and so they tend to believe those words without applying themselves to rise above the adversity of those words. That is because they have become so comfortable in thinking what they think is true, it has become a habit. Habits are hard to break.

“Habits = Behaviors”: Habits develop into behaviors. Hurting people hurt other people. It is just that simple. Very rarely have I come across an angry individual who goes out of their way to make others happy. In fact, I have seen hurting people deliberately hurt others to bring them down and have said this somehow makes them feel better knowing someone else is hurting just as much as they are. I suppose this would account for the numerous abuse  and murder cases in the world today because this seems to be the only outlet a hurting person knows, trusts, and feels comfortable in doing. It is a horrible habit that, unfortunately, has become a behavior that is justified in their minds.

“Behaviors = Character”: Our behavior determines our character. People are known for what they do. Someone who carries a reputation for lying, stealing and cheating has built that reputation centered around those actions. The same goes for someone who has proven to be trustworthy, honest and caring. People are more drawn to these traits. Our character derives from the behaviors we set forth and also determine the type of characters we draw to us.

“Character = Destiny”: The kind of character we build for ourselves will determine our destiny. For example, if we are a well disciplined individual, chances are we will go far in life. We will resist the temptation to procrastinate in order to get things done. However, if we are lazy, we may not accomplish much in life due to neglecting important responsibilities. This is why it is so important to take heed as to the people who you allow in your life because they, too, can determine your destiny…

(to be continued…)

© 2013 Learus Ohnine