Who is Sucking The Life Out Of You?

I call these people “energy vampires”. Their existence depends on the necessities of those similar to that of a real vampire’s needs, except they do not feed on blood to survive. They thrive on draining the energy and the life out of kind, generous, warm-hearted people instead. As they draw them into their life using a smokescreen of what appears to be helplessness, neediness, and vulnerability, they measure their victim’s tolerance level to assess just how much of their madness they can handle before going mad themselves. By the time their current victim starts to crack up, they will then have enough energy to scope the area for a new victim to feed on once again.

This vicious cycle for nourishment continues throughout their entire lifetime, for without a constantly supply of unsuspecting charitable good Samaritans to feed upon, they will die. They use the nourishment they need so they can appear fresh and anew to each additional victim, for the more the merrier so as to not have to worry about being stuck without a fresh supply of energy. In fact, the advantage of living a lifestyle like this is not so much about satisfying their unquenchable hunger for human beings to drain the life out of, but it is more or less about robbing someone else of something that was once, or twice, robbed from them.

The sad part about all of this is that it is extremely hard for the victim to tear away from the vampire long enough to replenish their own energy. During the energy draining stages is when the victim is at their weakest point, and also under the most scrutiny by the energy vampire, especially if they do not already have a firm replacement already lined up and waiting. The victim will see signs within themselves of changes they would have never anticipated that utterly contradict their own nature, such as feelings of loneliness or wanting solitude more often than usual, feelings of despair about their own proficiency in making decisions, cold-heartedness and bitterness towards the opposite sex, repeatedly unexplained physical ailments, and a mental state of confusion or a feeling of “being lost” at immense levels never experienced before.

The best defense a victim of an energy vampire can have is a stable mind.  Victims have a tendency to take on other people’s problems as if they were their own, and in a sense, they are their problems too if they allow them to affect their state of mind. The victim should never forget that it was their potent strength of character, their personality, their morals, their standards, and their goodwill are what drew the energy vampire to them to in the first place, and those qualities were there without the need of having to feed off of someone else to get them. Those qualities are what victims should hold onto dearly, with honor and pride, because it is this foundation that was utilized with good intentions to help the energy vampire that will also save the victim from eternal damage through self-healing. In other words, the recycling of another energy vampire into society stops here.

If you have ever been a victim of an energy vampire, NEVER EVER let a person rob you of your identity OR your sanity and change who you are…

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

For The Men (Ladies, Do Not Read This)

Men, you are going to have to stop reading into everything we women say and do, and starting taking us for face-value. When you add on extra words to ours, do NOT complain about how complicated we women when you have just added fuel to the fire. Just accept the fact that maybe, JUST maybe, we women are much easier to get along with than you give us credit for.

If you want to understand us, try LISTENING to us for a start! We tell you everything you need to know about us from the beginning, and if you choose to ignore the facts, that is not our problem. There is no need to struggle with understanding how our minds work. If your woman seems confused, she probably is. She’s probably confused trying to figure out why you are still confused about what she means even after she has broken everything down into simple terms. She is not doing this to insult your intelligence; she is trying to make life with you as easy as possible to cut down on any chance for misunderstandings to occur later down the line.

Also, do not think for one second she does not want to understand you too. You guys are not as easy to read as you may think you are. Speak to her when you do not understand something she said or did. Ask her if she needs your help when you see her struggling to find the right words to say. But under no circumstances, do not assume you are reading her correctly. Make sure you are on the right track. And for Heaven’s sake, DO NOT TALK OVER HER WHILE SHE IS TALKING! Keep doing this and you will find yourself in the middle of a heated argument– dazed, confused, and getting nowhere.

Another bad habit that needs to stop is telling your woman “we’ll talk about this later” when she’s expressing herself. Do you turn off the television during the final quarter of the Superbowl game and say “I’ll watch this later”? Remember, she notices everything about you, including how you hold your attention towards anything you feel is important to you until the very end. Saying you want to put her off until later will register in her mind that she is not important enough to you for you to give you undivided attention to.

Oh, and by the way, it is pointless to go out looking for a replacement for her. We women are all pretty much wired the same anyway, so you might as well work it out with the one you are with.


© 2013 Learus Ohnine


For The Ladies (Men, Do Not Read This)

Ladies, how many times do we have to explain to men we are not as complicated as they make us out to be? It is as if they refuse to listen to what we say and would rather analyze everything we say and do as if we are speaking in codes. True, there used to be a time when we had that reputation because it was a fact; we did speak in codes, only because when we did speak, we felt like we are not being heard. We tell a man exactly what we need to fill satisfied, and in turn, the man runs around and does everything else except for what we told them to do. Then, they look as us like WE ARE the confused ones! Hence we developed “the codes” for the sake of our own sanity.

Then, there are some of you ladies who still try to be deliberately confusing by using the “old skool” fashioned way of running circles around the guy’s head with words and phrases that even you yourself do not understand, and thinking it’s funny. Stop that. Nobody can understand you unless you are straight-forward and to the point. There is no need to confuse the guy and then say “he does not understand me”. Of course he doesn’t. Would you? Make up your mind before you speak. And please, think carefully before you make up your mind, too.

Also, do not think of your man as a “baby”. He is not a child. He can think, walk, and hopefully talk for himself. We women tend to use our mothering skills on a man, and then wonder why he cowards away in the corner. It is okay to meet his basic needs, and even spoil him once in a while, but remember you are playing with fire. If he gets too comfortable with your mothering ways, he will expect it all the time. You will have a robot out of him. The minute you change, he will change. Always treat him in a consistent, stable manner and neither one of you will be scratching your heads at the end of the day trying to figure out why you two are at each other’s throats so often.

Ladies, I hope this makes sense. Let’s stop the games.

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

When You Are In A Relationship… (part 2)

“When you are in a relationship with someone who is periodically displaying extremely disgruntled reactions to petty matters followed by an unwillingness to discuss and resolve them, it is a sign they are hiding something detrimental to the relationship itself.”

Watch out for this, especially in a romantic relationship where the person has a history of cheating. What appears to be a trivial matter to you (and it probably really is trivial) is actually really seriously important to them because they do not want to expose themselves. More than likely, what they want to cover up is something you really need to know, especially if it changes the whole dynamics of the relationship’s fate, and they will try to throw as much confusion your way as best as they possibly can in order to make sure you never find out what is really going on behind your back. For example: the guy who is cheating on his girlfriend might demand (not ask) her to make certain moves and/or actions, that do not make any sense at all pertaining to the circumstances, however, it makes all the sense in the world to him because it is part of his plan. When he explains his logic behind his requests, and that’s IF he explains it, what he says makes no sense at all whatsoever. What she does affects his secrets, so he tries to discreetly control her actions so as to not mess up his plans he is intends to carry out behind her back.

I once knew a middle-aged guy who used women to survive. He preyed on women he thought were naïve, simple-minded, and gullible even if those traits were in no way apart of their character. As long as he believed in this idealization he created of these women in his head, to him it was a reality, and he would treat all these women according to his idealizations.  By living in his head this way, it gave him the confidence to approach each of his “victims”, and the stupidity to create a fictitious image of himself no matter how preposterous he ending up looking to all of them, thinking he could never be exposed. Even if he did land himself a good woman, his mouth was forever filled with complaints that sounded like they originated from the mind of a child.  He never had any real logical complaints about his woman, although he wanted it to appear that way to her as a way to hide the truth. In actuality, his petty complaints were all excuses to create distance between them while he worked on seducing another woman. Once he figured he had the other woman totally sold on him, he would create just enough distance between him and the other woman in order to buy him some time to make amends with his own woman. As confusing as all this sounds, the reason for this ridiculous merry-go-round of dubious behavior was because he had a bizarre personality disorder; the kind that no therapy or drug could cure, with one of his symptoms being a distorted sense of self. He knew this, and although a lot of effort and behavior modification could have improved his life quite tremendously, he chose to make a mess of it anyway. He cared less about the string of devastated yet enlightened women he left behind him because the part of the human brain that processes human emotions was missing in his. Simply put, he had no conscious. He could not feel yet he knew what he was doing. In the end, he reaped exactly what he sowed—nothing. He ended up alone anyway.

(Think about it: if your mate tends to overreact so strongly to minor problems, how do you think they will react when something major pops up?)


“When you are in a relationship where the other person constantly speaks in first person, chances are they think in first person, too.”

Take note of the person who frequently uses the terms “I” and “me”, even when discussing things that include the both of you or includes others in general relating to the business. Note how many times they use the term “we” when there are others involved. I will tell you why this is so extremely important…

Suppose this is a romantic relationship. Your significant other refers to the things you do together when describing them to others in phrases like “I went to see a movie” or “I went to the beach”, even though the both of you went to see the movie and went to the beach together. They have verbally excluded you out of the scenario. While the two of you may have very well been there as a couple, the person has also mentally excluded you out of it as if you were not really there with them at all, and more than likely experienced it in the same way; you just happened to be an “accessory”.  This person thinks in terms of themselves in everything they do; everything they do is all about them. The person does not see the activities you two share together as doing them as a couple.

Now suppose this is a business relationship. Your partner discusses company plans in terms of “I created a plan” when in fact the plan was created by the inputs of the entire group, not just one individual. More than likely, everything involving the company is expressed in terms of “I” and “me” by this partner. This partner does not give full credit to all of his or her partners involved in any of the brainstorming processes that results in a successful outcome. However, if any plans were to fail, notice how your partner will suddenly change his or her vocabulary to “they” or “them” instead of “I” or “me”.

Although both the romantic and business individual may be surrounded by others, they actually view the world in terms as if they are the only ones in it and the world revolves around them. The term “selfishness” comes to mine. Chances are, their selfishness shows in other areas of their life as well. In a relationship, selfishness hinders closeness. In a business partnership, selfishness steals credit from where credit is due. All in all, there is usually a lack of respect for any other individual outside of their worlds and their cooperation skills are extremely poor.


(to be continued…)


© 2013 Learus Ohnine


A friend of mine told me some very disturbing news today. They have to go to a funeral tomorrow. A friend of theirs was shot dead,at point blank range, at the age of 25. Apparently, this friend was a “playboy”, “player”, or whatever term these young people use these days to describe a guy who just cannot keep his dick in his pants no matter how hard he tries.

The whole disturbing part about this news is that this is not the first time this has happened to one of his/her friends. The deceased all have one thing in common: they are gigolos.

Okay so maybe the term “gigolo” is so outdated and old-fashioned that it makes no sense to even try to revive the word, but its the best reference I know to describe the circumstances behind why these people are forever gone. The term has about as much of a chance of reviving itself as do the people who lost their lives already because of this lifestyle.

So why am I writing this blog about it?
Because I needed to vent my disgust in the meaning behind the term itself.

Maybe I have to be a man to understand this, but I really cannot see what is the point in hoping from woman’s bed to another, simultaneously, and somehow this is supposed to be… uh… fun?

I just cannot see the logic in it. And neither could the outraged spouse of the woman who caught her cheating with my friend’s dead friend. Obviously, her husband must of felt the same way, and his first thought was there was no need to discuss the matter, for he let the trigger do all the speaking on his behalf.

I cannot imagine a time in my life, thus far, when I have been so emotionally distraught where I wanted to kill someone. Never. I may have joked about it, but never literally.

Then again, we can never say never…

As for the dead friend, supposedly he knew what he was up against when he started fooling around with this woman and gambled his life away in spite of what he knew. He knew the woman had a husband who was basically a maniac. Maniacs do not handle emotions well. Look at the end result of this affair gone out of control and that explains what I am trying to say.

But for now, I just want to know… what is the big deal about cheating? To me, it seems its risks outweigh any benefits that can be gained from it. Maybe not all affairs come to a tragic end such as this one did, but there is still that chance of crossing a point of no return in so many ways.

My opinion to those that enjoy cheating–why not leave the person you’re with and just get it over with? Or is it that having more than one lover provides a sense of security?

I guess some things are just not meant to be understood…

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Is it just me, or…

… does it seem like time is moving faster this year than any other year before?…

… does it seem like people are rushing everywhere, but end up going nowhere?…

… does it seem like everyone has something to say, but they wind up saying nothing?…

… does it seem like the more you cry, the less you feel?…

… does it seem like hearts are getting colder while minds are turning into infernos?. ..

… does it seem like fear has become a commodity?…

… does it seem like everybody cares, but nobody wants to know?…

… does it seem like the louder you scream, no one notices you?…

… does it seem like everyone is into themselves, yet are still lonely?…

… does it seem like people are more distant than ever before, yet they appear to be closer than we thought?…

… does it seem like visiting the past reveals the hard truth that the past never existed?…

… does it seem like the phrase “the end of the world” really means the end of YOUR world?…

Ah well…  was just a thought…

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Something to think about: “Walls were Made to be Broken” (part 4) The Demolition Process

Hopefully by now, you have uncovered which walls need your immediate attention and which walls do not. I would suggest beginning the demolition process on any wall that is causing an immediate hindrance to your daily living, such as anything that is interfering with your peace of mind. Nothing compares to enjoying life with a healthy state of mind. Remember – you only get one life; it is better to make the most of the time you have to spend on this earth than to waste it and regret it later.

So on to the demolition…

The demolition process basically starts off following the same procedures for both Conscious and Unconscious Walls. The only difference is the amount of time it takes to completely destroy them. That time is determined by factors such as when that wall was placed there and who put it there. For example: an Unconscious Wall that has been built by an authority figure, such as a parental figure, a lover, or whomever you have depended on for emotional support and approval, may take years to demolish simply because it has been ingrained inside your heart and mind as a necessity for survival. Let’s say, for instance, a child who grows up in an environment that is unsympathetic and is full of callousness may have had to learn to adapt to that kind of situation by becoming so thick-skinned that they do not know how to love or be loved. They reject anyone who comes across as caring and sympathetic, or the total opposite, because they do not recognize that real love and are only receptive to people who resemble the authority figures of the environment they have grown up in. They will recreate their childhood environment because that IS their comfort zone. It may take years before this person can make a successful personal transformation, but it is not impossible.

So let’s begin with a less challenging wall to destroy: the Conscious Wall. Just a quick recall, a Conscious Wall is one that is derived from a realistic fear stemmed from an illogical belief. Examples of this would be along the lines of stereotyping: ALL marriages end in divorce, ALL blondes are dimwitted, ALL males are cheaters, and ALL women are not as intelligent as a man, and so on. Plenty can be said about the stereotyping of gender, sexual preference, and races but I will not get too deep into those details. When stereotype a person, place or thing, we will react to them according to what we feel is appropriate, and that includes avoidance. Keep in mind it is healthy and wise to avoid something or someone we know for a fact is not in our best interest. However, stereotyping is not based on facts. Stereotyping is based on opinion and does not necessarily mean one part applies to the whole, if you catch my drift.

But how do we debunk any hypothetical stereotyping beliefs we may have?

Get out there and find out for yourself. Be realistic; nobody is perfect. We all have flaws, hang-ups, etc., but is that not what makes us all unique? None of our personal flaws may have anything to do with our gender, our cultural background, or our sexual preference.  The funny thing about social networking, such as Facebook, Twitter, Linked-In, etc., is we all can be whoever we want to be behind the screen, but it is the words that we speak that will be noticed by others first. We do not see a face, a race, or a gender unless we post a profile picture, and even that sometimes is not always truthful. The bottom line is: you will never know what you are missing until you get to know the character of a person. Drop everything that you have heard and read about a gender, a culture, or a sexual preference and just meet a variety of people from all, and I do mean ALL, walks of life and from any and every category. Remember, you yourself fall into one or more categories. Would you want someone to discriminate against you without giving you a fair chance?


© 2013 Learus Ohnine

The Realization Of Character

Everything we do starts with words. Words will determine who we are. Whatever we think we are, we will become. It is no wonder why we see so many people who struggle with low self-esteem, but that is such an extensive topic that I will save for a later discussion.

I am sure you all have heard the “formula” for how one’s character comes into fruition and the end result of where our character will lead us. If not, I will briefly go over the famous formula in order of importance:

“Words = Thoughts”

“Thoughts = Actions”

“Actions = Habits”

“Habits = Behaviors”

“Behaviors = Character”

“Character = Our Destiny”

“Words = Thoughts”: Words will determine your thoughts. Words are very powerful. Like it says in the Bible, “Life and death are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21). When we insult someone, we are killing them figuratively. When we compliment someone, we are giving them life. It does not matter if words are spoken or written; they will have the same affect on the listener and/or reader. We begin to think exactly what words tell us to think. We should be aware of what we say to one another as well as what we hear and read because once we let those words take root into our minds, we become those words.

“Thoughts = Actions”: Our thoughts have a heavy impact on the things we do. Most all of our actions start with our thoughts.  We can think ourselves into motivation, inspiration, encouragement, and so on. On the other hand, we can think ourselves into procrastination, depression, discouragement, and so on. Our thoughts will determine what we will do next.

“Actions = Habits”: Our actions will become our habits. Have you ever met someone who seemed impossible to change the way they think about themselves? They have learned to adapt to a particular way of thinking that their whole life is arranged around their thought processes.  They withdraw instead of socializing. They retreat when faced with challenges. They may have been told time and time again that they are stupid or a failure, and so they tend to believe those words without applying themselves to rise above the adversity of those words. That is because they have become so comfortable in thinking what they think is true, it has become a habit. Habits are hard to break.

“Habits = Behaviors”: Habits develop into behaviors. Hurting people hurt other people. It is just that simple. Very rarely have I come across an angry individual who goes out of their way to make others happy. In fact, I have seen hurting people deliberately hurt others to bring them down and have said this somehow makes them feel better knowing someone else is hurting just as much as they are. I suppose this would account for the numerous abuse  and murder cases in the world today because this seems to be the only outlet a hurting person knows, trusts, and feels comfortable in doing. It is a horrible habit that, unfortunately, has become a behavior that is justified in their minds.

“Behaviors = Character”: Our behavior determines our character. People are known for what they do. Someone who carries a reputation for lying, stealing and cheating has built that reputation centered around those actions. The same goes for someone who has proven to be trustworthy, honest and caring. People are more drawn to these traits. Our character derives from the behaviors we set forth and also determine the type of characters we draw to us.

“Character = Destiny”: The kind of character we build for ourselves will determine our destiny. For example, if we are a well disciplined individual, chances are we will go far in life. We will resist the temptation to procrastinate in order to get things done. However, if we are lazy, we may not accomplish much in life due to neglecting important responsibilities. This is why it is so important to take heed as to the people who you allow in your life because they, too, can determine your destiny…

(to be continued…)

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Ways To Test Someone’s Character: The Response Test

This blog would coincide with a previous blog I wrote entitled ” A Life Without Problems: Character and Ability”, whereas I briefly defined the two terms, but for now, I would like to concentrate more on character.

The character of a person distinctly defines who they are. It is the image we build for ourselves based on our moral and ethical qualities. It is what determines how we are approached and why we are not approached by others. Unfortunately, we live in a world where imposters hide behind a fake wall of integrity, compassion, sympathy, and all other forms of “goodwill” for the sake of covering up their true identity. This, of course, is called “charm”, but that is something that only lasts for the moment. Character lasts a lifetime.

There are ways to test the character of a person, and with these tests, you may discover signs that are sometimes inadvertently overlooked when getting to know someone.
Test their response to:

How do they react to correction
How do they react to loss
How do they react to praise
How do they react to receiving a gift

Reaction to correction:

“You think I am wrong? You must be crazy!”

“You think I am wrong? You might be right!”

Note how both responses start the same but end entirely different based on the person’s own self-perception. The first response is a sign the person feels they are never wrong, and if anyone thinks they are, there must be something wrong with them. This is a sign this person is definitely hard to get along with. They want to be right all the time, even when they know they are wrong. Negotiating is obsolete for them, or just purely does not apply. They rarely apologize, and when they do, there is always some sort of condition to it, such as “I may be wrong, but you are (fill in the blank)”. If they do finally break down and admit they were wrong, they will try to turn the focus onto the millions of things they feel you did wrong regardless if it has anything to do with the situation at hand.  They can never take full blame or responsibility for their own actions without somehow pinning part of their responsibility onto you, too.

Reaction to loss:

“I am so glad it did not happen to me!”

“I hope everyone is okay.”

Keep in mind the normal reaction to hearing about someone’s loss. Usually, the first words that come out are “I am sorry to hear that”, or “are you okay”, or some form of showing concern for the other person’s well-being. The first response shows a person who obviously only thinks about themselves, how they feel, and how the situation affects them. They show no sympathy or empathy because they have none. They cannot put themselves in other’s shoes because the only shoes they have an interest in is their own. Selfish people do not make good friends, partners, or lovers since they lack the compassion. People who lack compassion are most likely to lack remorse for their actions when they have hurt you.
Reaction to praise:

“It’s about time everyone sees how great I am!”

“I do not see what all the fuss over me is about.”

I am sorry, I have to say this… that first response is just too obvious. It almost makes you want to immediately take your praise back. I have literally heard people say this out loud and expected others to cheer them on in return. Arrogance is never pretty nor is it attractive. An arrogant person will always look down on you in spite of all the palpable reasons not to. They cannot wait for the opportunity to disrespect you in some way, shape or form because in doing so gives them a sense of power. However, do not mistake pride for arrogance. A person can be proud of their accomplishments, their achievements, and so forth without expressing their sense of superiority at someone else’s expense.
Reaction to receiving a gift:

“It’s about time I got this!”

“How did you know this is what I wanted!”

Please do not dismiss the first response as a joke. This person secretly believes they deserve some sort of special entitlement or recognition. They may feel everyone should be grateful just to have them in their presence the minute they step into the room. Never expect an arrogant person to be grateful for what you do for them. They will never appreciate it no matter how much, how soon, or how effective you are at doing it.  They usually expect others to do for them what they do not want to make the effort to do for themselves.  They live their life thinking the world owes them. They rarely give gifts, and when they do, it is arranged in such a way that the gift will benefit them more than it will the recipient.

So why do we overlook these signs?

Well, the best explanation I can come up with is that we get so lost in the moment of the initial impression, in the euphoria of it all, that we tend to lose sight of what is real and what is not. Our minds go astray and begin to drift off into the portrait of what appears to be wholesome, not realizing something very different is missing from the entire equation. The next thing we know, we become overwhelmed with an inexplicable puzzling feeling that something is just quite not right with the person, yet we still find ourselves magnetically drawn to the madness to find out what is really going on beneath the surface. By this time, we are too far gone to accept the probability that maybe this person is just not who they say they are. We have invested our precious time, our energy, and unfortunately for some, our money into someone with a bogus identity who does not deserve any of it. This is when we start to want to seek closure, only to find ourselves in a whirlwind of confusing dead-end trails.

I can tell you from my first-hand experience it is not worth getting too close to a person who has forged their image in order to gain your respect, attention, and trust. Once you have realized that person is not deemed worthy of any more of your time, energy and resources, it is best to just cut your losses and walk away. You will never get closure, and they will make sure of it. The longer you stick around to figure out the real identity, the longer it will take for you to restore your own sanity, correct the damages (if any), and begin to rebuild your life.

Look into the mirror. Take each response and say them out loud to yourself. If the first response in each test makes you feel uncomfortable, remember that feeling the next time someone makes you feel the same way and avoid that person before you end up regretting it. If you are comfortable with saying all of the first responses, check yourself. Something is not right within you…

© 2013 Learus Ohnine

Work and Romance: Can they mix?

Would you date someone who works at your job? I always get mixed answers when I ask this question. Most of the answers I get are all based around an office cliché that you should never date someone at your job, well, just because you should never date someone at your job. Period. That was the most common answer coming from those whom have had failed romances involving a fellow coworker. It is as if they have dismissed all the factual reasons behind why their romance really did not turn out as they hoped it would, and instead have opted for the easiest most blameless rational they could think of: you should never date someone at your job.  Each individual had their own rationale behind why dating should not be something that happens in within the work environment, and their rationales make sense. While I can respect their perspectives, I have my own opinions that are in opposition as to why I do not agree with some of their rationales, like:

It does not look professional when you date someone who works at your job

Who says the entire staff has to know? Whatever you do in your personal life does not have to broadcasted across the office floor.  Nobody has to know your business. A romance involves two people, not every name listed on the payroll system, and you do not need their approval to make it happen.

If the romance falls apart, it will be difficult to work next to the other person

Not necessarily. If this is a true concern, bring it to the forefront in the beginning of the romance and discuss how the two of you will address the situation should it ever occur. A majority of beginning work-related romances do not think of the future in terms of “the end” anyway, so it would be in the best interest of both individuals involved to be aware of the impact a breakup will have on each other if the romance were to dissolve.

A romance between coworkers is doomed from the start just because they work together

I cannot understand why. Whatever your partner does behind your back, he/she will do it regardless of whether or not you two work at the same job. Whatever actions a person does when they think no one is watching, be it good or bad, is done because it is a part of their character. If your partner is a dishonest person,  they will be that way no matter where they work at. If your partner is an honest person, they will be that way no matter where they work at. Both partners should be clear and precise on boundaries (if any), what they have to offer, what they expect in return, and what they will and will not tolerate. This is standard issue in any romance.

All in all, I personally think any romance can work regardless of where it originates. When two people decided to join together, no influence can tear their union apart unless they allow it. The same principle applies when two people decide to separate; no influence can bind that union back together again unless they allow it. It is all a matter of choice.

With that being said, I do not think anyone can help with whom they fall in love with and should not be penalized for it because of a cliche.

Agree or disagree?